Week 5: The Tools of Reframing — Transform How You Think and Feel

(If you’re new here, this post is part of a 12-week series: The SONG Framework for Living Your Dreams. You can catch the introduction here.)

From your homework in Week 4, I hope you’ve been able to identify what’s been holding you back. If not, I encourage you to pause here and revisit that step before diving into this week’s topic on reframing.

This week, we’ll explore a few tools and techniques that can help you overcome the barriers keeping you from your dreams.

Modify Your Internal Dialogue / Affirm Yourself

Why do you speak to yourself in a way you’d never speak to a dear friend?

The one person you’ll spend your entire life with is you. So, it’s worth learning how to be a little kinder to yourself. Constructive self-reflection is healthy—but constant self-criticism only keeps you stuck.

Here’s a simple strategy: Cut and Replace.
When you notice yourself being self-critical, pause. Observe what triggered it and how you’re talking to yourself. Then, rephrase it as if you were speaking to someone you love.

For example:

Instead of “I always mess things up,” say “I made a mistake, but I’m learning.”
Instead of “I can’t do this,” try “I’m still learning how to do this.”

This takes practice, but over time, your brain learns to follow your new, kinder script.

The Art of Reframing

Small shifts in language can make a huge difference in how you perceive challenges.

Try adding the word “yet” to your sentences.

“I’m not good at communication… yet.”

Do you feel the difference? It immediately tells your mind that growth is possible—that this is something you can work on and get better at.

Mini Experiments

Challenge your fears. Test your assumptions. Gather real data.

Ask yourself:

Is this really true?
What evidence do I have for or against this belief?

When you test your fears, you often find they’re not as solid as you thought. Pair this with pleasure and reward—celebrate small wins to interrupt old patterns. Notice your triggers and consciously choose a different outcome.

Reflection

Reflection helps increase self-awareness. Whether it’s journaling, meditating, going on a silent retreat, or simply taking a quiet walk—find a rhythm that allows you to pause and observe yourself.

Through reflection, you begin to notice when your barriers show up, what triggers them, and how you can respond differently next time.

Week 5 Homework: Practice a Reframing Tool That Works for You

From the barriers you identified in Week 4 and the reframing tools we’ve discussed, pick one strategy you can start applying right away.

Then, observe your thoughts, your emotions, and your level of awareness as you go through your week.

A Fun Tool I Use Personally

On my bathroom mirror, I stuck glitter stickers that spelled out “High Five” and “Smile.” At first, I’d high-five my reflection and smile at myself each morning—it instantly lifted my mood and made my mornings brighter.

Over time, I stopped consciously noticing the stickers. But every now and then, during a low moment, I catch sight of them again—and just like that, I find myself smiling.

So, I challenge you to find something small that helps you reframe your mood or situation. Maybe it’s a note on your mirror, a song, or a daily affirmation. Whatever it is, let it be your gentle reminder to see yourself and your journey in a kinder light.